For those of you still unaware, the new boy I've been dating is recently divorced. How recently, you ask? As in it was officially final today (Monday). The only real experience I've had with divorce is when my parents divorced (10 years ago) and when friends of mine have gone through it. I guess it is to be expected that he is having a terribly hard time with it. He keeps talking about how he's a failure at love and marraige. This isn't constant, mind you. His emotions have been a veritable roller coaster of late. I repeat, I guess it's to be expected. Unfortunately, I'm at a complete loss as to how to act. No matter what I do or say, it seems to be the wrong thing. If I give him space, he gets needy. If I try to comfort him, he gets distant. How can I do the right thing? Given time, I'm sure it will all work out, but it is really hard to be patient. I've never been one to sit around and watch people I care about suffer--I want to help in any way possible. It's when I can't help that I feel like a failure. Was this relationship doomed from the start with its proximity to the separation/divorce? He said that I wasn't the "rebound girl," that in fact there had been a few of those. Nevertheless, I am the first person with whom he chose to enter into a relationship. Too make matters worse, it is easy to see myself growing old with this guy. How do we get past the tough times together...?
Any advice or words of wisdom? Keep in mind, I can't always be strong enough for the both of us. In fact, sometimes it's hard to be strong enough for just myself.